Thursday, July 31, 2008
I let Brooke have a Tea Party. She had so much fun. My only mistake was telling her a week before the party. She worried me every day about it.
Courtney and Alicyn was a big help. They served the little girls their tea and food.
The girls thought they were something with breakable plates and cups. They were so sweet picking their food up off their plate so lady like. Of course that did not last long when they started eating the cupcakes. LOL
The girls got along so well. I thought they might fuss some, but they did not. They all played GREAT together.
Monday, July 28, 2008
This black cat has made our house its home, but we don't need it. She is very sweet. The only problem is she is pregnant and she is huge. She looks like a very young cat. Would somebody like to have her???
We have two puppies to give away and now this cat. I hate to call the pound to the cat because I know they will probably kill her because they will not want to deal with the kittens.
I am allergic to cats so I don't really need to have to deal with kittens. Surely there is a animal lover out there that wants these animals. TAMMY, LEAH< KATIE????? Is your animal shelter needing some more animals? LOL
Saturday, July 26, 2008
I am really looking forward to school starting back. I never dreamed I would say that. God has helped me to grow in some areas this summer. Last year was a struggle for me with homeschool. There was many days I thought of putting Courtney in Public School, but God was always faithful to help me see that was not the right decision. I believe that God wanted me to homeschool and I know he will help me.
I am not a teacher, and it is very hard to get things across sometimes. When I post on this blog I am not a professional, and don't try to be. Many times I just type and don't even think about the wording. I know some of you have made comments about my Southern talk and my was and were and my wording. (See you better watch who you talk to and tell things to.:) Smile;
Please remember I am not doing blogging for a grade. If blogging was a term paper I would search it over and over. My grades were very good in school. I just don't take the time to do that on my blog.
Anyway..... God allowed me to find this book this summer. "Homeschooling with a Meek and Quiet Spirit." by Teri Maxwell.
This book was such a huge blessing to me. God helped me to gain so much from it. I found the reason why sometimes homeschooling is not easy. We have to homeschool with a meek and Quiet spirit. If you don't have this book you should order it.
I will be using this book all year because I found so much help with it.
Meek according to the Webster Dictionary means "mild of temper, soft, gentle, not easily provoked or irritated."
Quiet according to Webster means "peaceable, not turbulent, not giving offense, mild, meek, and contented.
There is so many things that will try and rob our meek and quiet spirit. I will share a few things that I got from the book. Fear and Worry is a big robber. The bible tells us in 2Timothy 1:7 " For God hath not given us the spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind."
I find myself worrying over the curriculum we are using, the education my child is getting, if I am doing the right thing. I worry that I am a terrible mom and teacher. Reading this book helped me to see that I don't need to worry about those things. I need to pray and let God worry about them. Many times last year I felt like quitting homeschooling because it was not easy. In fact some days was so hard that I would be sick. Teri helped me with this thought. " May we never choose to turn back from the path the Lord has set us upon simply because it isn't easy."
Sometimes we feel like a failure as a homeschool mom. I know myself I felt like I could not handle it anymore. I felt like it was not for me and my children. I felt powerless. Another thought from Terri that helped me, "We might be powerless, but God is not. "Philippians 1:6 Being confident of this very thing that he which hath begun a good work in you will perform it until the day of Jesus Christ."
Homeschooling is a good thing. I believe that is what God wants me to do.
There is way to many things for me to name that will try and rob your meek and quiet spirit.
Terri said in her book that the list for the meek and quiet robbers fall into three main categories. Fear, disorganization, and anger." Each of these is the opposite of a meek and quiet spirit. These negative characteristics keep us from teaching (and loving) our children as we so greatly desire."
We do not have to be helpless victims of our emotions. We do not have to let our feelings rule our lives and leave us forever at odds with a meek and quiet spirit.
Depression also plays a huge role in stealing our meek and quiet spirit. That is something I feel we have to work on very hard. I have saw how depression has effected many people this year, and by God's grace I refuse to give into that.
Contentment is something that will help and greatly influence our meek and quiet spirit. God is helping me with that also. Sometimes we always want something different. We want a better house, a better car, a better curriculum for our school year or what ever. Once we get these things we find ourself complaining because they don't make us as happy as we thought they would.
I know I have thought many times of things I could do with my days if I was not homeschooling. As Terri said, "This only leads to discontentment." That will rob your meek and quiet spirit.
Contentment is something I am praying much about. I am very grateful that God has allowed me to stay home with my children and homeschool them.
1 Timothy 6:6 "But godliness with contentment is great gain."
Philippians 4:11-12 Not that I speak in respect of want: for I have learned in whatsoever state I am, therewith to be content. I know how to be abased, and I know how to abound: every where and in all things I am instructed both to be full and to be hungry, both to abound and to suffer need.
I would recommend this book very highly if you homeschool. If you want to order a copy you can go to the Maxwells web site and order it.
They have many books to order. She has a schedule book that is pretty good if you have a large family. I only have two children so it is not a easy thing for me. I do plan on a schedule this year. I might post about that later. For tonight I must go.
Thursday, July 24, 2008
Monday, July 21, 2008
What is trauma? For our adopted children,
*trauma is being separated from their birthmother. (yes, they realize at this young age that they are being separated from the person who carried them for 9 months, the familiar voice, smells, and movements.)
*trauma is not having your needs met when you cry. (huge!)
*trauma is living in an institution.
*trauma is being tied to your crib*trauma can for some, involve physical and/or se*x*ual abuse.
*trauma is being neglected
*trauma is being handed to strangers that have been waiting so long to meet you. the environment they have been in for a year or two or more, is all they know. It was not a good place, but they are too little to realize this. they are taken from all that is familiar to them.
Trauma is any stressful event which is prolonged, overwhelming, or unpredictable. Though we are familiar with events impacting children such as abuse, neglect, and domestic violence, until recently, the full impact of trauma on adopted children has not been understood.
An important aspect of trauma is in recognizing that simply because a child has been removed from a traumatic environment, this does not merely remove the trauma from the childs memory. In fact, stress is recognized to be the one primary key to unlocking traumatic memories. Unfortunately for both the adopted child and family, the experience of most traumas in the childs life is that the traumatic experiences typically occur in the context of human relationships. From that point forward, stress in the midst of a relationship will create a traumatic re-experiencing for the child, leading the child to feel threatened, fearful, and overwhelmed in an environment which otherwise may not be threatening to other people.
Keys to Healing Trauma in the Adopted Child:
1. Trauma creates fear and stress sensitivity in children. Even for a child adopted from birth, their internal systems may already be more sensitive and fearful than that of a child remaining with his biological parents. You must also consider the first nine months in which the child developed. These early experiences as well could have major implications.
2. Recognize and be more aware of fear being demonstrated by your child. Be more sensitive and tuned in to the small signals given such as clinging, whining, not discriminating amongst strangers, etc. All are signs of insecurity which can be met by bringing the child in closer, holding, carrying, and communicating to the child that he is feeling scared, but you will keep him safe.
3. Recognize the impact of trauma in your own life. One of the single greatest understandings parents can have is a self-understanding. Research tells us that far more communication occurs non-verbally than verbally. Understanding the impact of past trauma in your own life will help you become more sensitive to when your reactions are coming from a place other than your existing parent/child experience. Re-experiencing past trauma is common when parents are placed in an ongoing stressful environment.
4. Reduce external sensory stimulation when possible. Decrease television, overwhelming environments, number of children playing together at one time, and large family gatherings. When necessary that these events take place, keep the child close, explain to him that he may become stressed and he can come to you when needed.
5. Do Time-In instead of Time-out. Rather than sending the stressed out and scared child to the corner to think about his behavior, bring him into to you and help him to feel safe and secure. Internally, this will then permit him the ability to think about his actions. Though time-in is not a time for lecturing, it will allow your child an opportunity to calm his stress and then think more clearly. Another effective key is to let the child decide how much time-in he needs.
6. There is never enough affection in the world. A very simple technique for time is the affection prescription 10-20-10. Give a child 10 minutes of quality time and attention first thing in the morning, 20 minutes in the afternoon, and 10 in the evening. Following this prescription of time has proven to have a great impact on the most negative behavior.
In closing, never forget that you are a great parent. During times of stress you wont always feel like it, but both you and your child were meant to be together. Your child will teach you far more about yourself than you may have ever realized without him. Give yourself time to refuel, connect, and communicate. And finally, a secure parental relationship is the single greatest gift you can give your child. When the parental relationship is secure this will permit the child a foundation to grow from.
Copyright© 2006 Dr. Bryan Post. All rights reserved
Friday, July 18, 2008
Tuesday, July 15, 2008
Kelly I know I have spoke to you, so you don't have to comment unless you want.
I have heard negative and positive, so I would like to see what others are saying.
I am so happy for Laurie and James. They are doing so well. James is better. Daniel is doing GREAT. I just LOVE these pictures of them. I wanted to post so you could see one happy family. I want some T-Shirts like they have. They are so cool.
I also really want to go back to China.:) I never thought I would say that.
Monday, July 14, 2008
Anyway we thought we would pass the word to some more moms that have children from China. I never dreamed we would have a huge turn out. I volunteered to make cupcakes. I started getting all these emails on people coming and I started to panic. I was thinking what have I got myself into. Susan was so sweet, and helped me make some cupcakes. We had plenty. I said maybe God multiplied them for us.
I got to meet some new faces. Susan and I think the next time it would be better to go somewhere that the moms can talk. We did not feel free to just let our little ones run around so we did not get to talk much to the other moms.
Chris and Kelly came over Saturday night. I think it really helped them with some of the things they faced last week. I finally had Kel laughing and she was even singing for us as we played games. The children had fun in the play room. I am so thankful God blessed us with that play room. It is so nice when kids come over.
Today we had to take Courtney to Birmingham to the Doctor. Her eyes have improved a good bit, so that was a nice feeling. She has to get new glasses, but it will be August before the insurance will pay for them. Brooke and Courtney fussed the whole way home from Birmingham. Kevin and I was ready to get out of the car. I tried to excuse the illness because they both had to get up around 5:45. They never get up that early.
Tonight Kelly and I are going to a Homeschool book sale. I am hoping to sale some of my books.
I have two boxes of homeschool books that I really need out of my way.
Well that is it for now.
One more thing... my nephews birthday was Thursday. We celebrated on Wed. I have pictures but they will have to wait until later. I am glad that things are better this year than they was last year with my nephew.
Wednesday, July 09, 2008
Tuesday, July 08, 2008
Congratulations to my friend Laurie and James. Baby Daniel found his forever family yesterday. I am so happy for them. Laurie and I started the adoption process at the same time. We was both doing American Adoption, but God showed Kevin and I very clear that our daughter was in China.
We went with God's voice and God lead us to our Beautiful Brooke.
Laurie and James have had so many ups and downs in their journey. Many times Laurie would call just because she needed a friend. I am so glad I have been there for her and been able to follow her journey.
Many times I had no answers, but I always said when the time is right you will get you child. Sure enough, after 6 years the time was right. Baby Daniel needed a mommy and daddy and now he has one.
As I see these pictures and I read Laurie's post it makes me want to go back. It brings so many memories to me. I know that right now that we financially can not go back. If it is Gods will he will make a way one day. I would be the first to say if we had the money I would go back. I still have this brown eyed little boy on my mind.
Wednesday, July 02, 2008
Tuesday, July 01, 2008
We finally got our swimming pool ready. Don't know how long it will last because it is one of those cheap Wal Mart ones. The pump is not worth a dime so it may not last all summer. Hopefully next year we can buy a nice pool.
The girls had a blast. Brooke loved the water. Courtney has been swimming since she was 3. I hope Brooke will decide to get rid of her floaties and swim this year. I don't think it will take long. Brooke was so tired when we came in from swimming. She had got real quite so I went to check on her. She was curled up in her bed asleep. This was like 5 minutes after we came in.